Adventures of the Single Life: Dealing With Younger Men

One of my concerns about being single again(especially in attending a Singles Ward), was that I don't look 29 years old and I don't particularly love the idea of being hit on by 22 year olds.  My prepared response to this eventuality is "Oh sweetie.  I'm 29 years old.  You SO can't handle this."  Haven't had to use it yet.  (But it's not like I'm beating any guys off with sticks...I'm not that girl...more on that another time)

However, there is one age group I hadn't considered being a problem.  8th grade boys.  I took the subbing job before the divorce.  And I am aware that quite frequently the young'uns at the schools have little crushes on me.  (Yes.  I'm ok with being the hot substitute.  It's far preferred to being the mean substitute.)  But I didn't realize how potentially crazy the situation could get.

So far, the darling 8th grade boys have discovered my recently divroced state, told me I look lonely(yep.  I exude loneliness.  Awesome.), asked for my number so they could text me(emphatic no), said they would friend me on facebook so then I would have friends(Now that they've discovered my full name, I've had to decline 2 different 8th grade boys on facebook, this weekend alone) and not be lonely, have faught over who would get to have me as their Valentine(it sounds like it should be flattering, but it's really really NOT), and gave me a valentine confessing their undying love for me(I'm really not exaggerating much there either).

6 more weeks.  I only have to survive 6 more weeks.  I've increased the privacy settings on Facebook and hopefully that should keep most of them at bay.  I'm dreading that I'm going to have to have some kind of discussion with the class about how inappropriate it would be for me to be friends with them on Facebook. 

One of my friends on facebook suggested that I ask if any of them have much older brothers(like twice their age).  I'm not really hopeful.  And somehow that still seems kind of gross.  Plus, who wants their 8th grade brother to play matchmaker for them?  I imagine this conversation taking place:

8th grade boy:  So substantially older brother, my substitute for choir is single.  She recently got divorced.  She's sad and lonely.  Want to date her?
Substantially Older Brother: Do I want to date your sad, lonely and pathetic recently divorced substitute teacher?(he's picturing some middle aged woman with sagging pantyhose, saggy boobs, wearing some awful floral print blouse with choclate stains(because that's what lonely women eat), and her hair all frizzy)  Um....Not so much bro.